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All hell was let loose last week when the news of Pastor Mrs Ibidunni Ighodalo’s death hits the internet. She isn’t just mourn in Nigeria a lot of people from other parts of the world mourn the death of this woman

Have I met her before she died? No!
Do I know her before she died? No!!

But at a point I dropped some hot tears while reading and watching so many things about her.

I learnt a lot from her life but in all, there is something that stood out for me in this woman’s life that I would love to share with you.

No it is not ” _let us do good in life_ ” that is also important but that is not it.

I watched one of her video interview where she talked about her infertility problem. She said she had an appendices surgery while she was young and they tampered with her tubes, since then she had tube blockage and she she can’t conceive naturally.

She had series of surgery to correct the tubes blockage but all to no avail and therein she resorted to doing IVF. She said she did the IVF 11 times for 11 years and in all these times she said ” _I WAS NOT LIVING I WAS ONLY EXISTING_ “


She explained  that the psychological issues and pains that come with doing IVF, the mood swings, hormone changes, the reactions to the  bad news of failed IVF and all of that is not a small thing.

One day on her birthday she said God spoke to her about this her waiting journey and she quit bothering herself on doing any IVF further and that instead she will start helping other women who are also waiting.

And that was the turning point. She started living and not just existing. She adopted 2 beautiful children and was raising them like her own and she lived happily after.

Imagine if she had done this from the beginning, 11 years of existing and not living and at last she wanted to live but death won’t even allow her.

There are so many things we do not have power over, they are just beyond us and it is in the hands of God to determine whether we will get them or not. Why He sometimes withhold them we don’t know and we can’t question Him.  Who born you, who born Monkey?

The things you can change change them, the ones you cannot LET GO and LIVE!!!

There are so many other options in life, explore them. ADOPTION is one of the options for Ibidun, she explored it and she started living her desired life.

There are so many things that will not follow or confirm with the norm, the norm of….. go to school, graduate, get a job, get married, have children, raise a family, retire from work, have grandchildren, enjoy life and die at age 100

No! Not all lives will be patterned and structured that way and that is the mystery of life.

It is good to try, it is great to keep on trying till you get it but, when whatever you are chasing has deprived you of living and it’s just making you to existing it is time to drop it  because, it doesn’t WORTH IT.


  Marriage is great, but you have tried and it’s not coming still LIVE PURPOSEFULLY.

  Children are amazing, you have tried but they are not coming still, LIVE PURPOSEFULLY.

  White collar job is beautiful, you have tried but it’s not coming still, LIVE PURPOSEFULLY.

    Millions in the account is cool, you have tried but it’s not coming still, LIVE PURPOSELY.
Being a graduate is great, you have tried but it’s not just coming through LIVE PURPOSEFULLY.

I can go on and on………..

Finally, do not allow the societal norms or expectations dictate how you will live your life, do not let societal pressure prevent you from living life to the fullest.

After all, you have just one life to live. And remember, before anything, you are human!

Mosun Olukoga said in her live video recently that she loves her children and take care of them very well but that doesn’t mean she won’t take care of HERSELF very well too because before she became a MOTHER, first, she is HUMAN and one day these children will be grown and they will all leave her to live their own lives.

She said so many deep and valuable things in that live video.

Chasing Marriage, children, career and all of that should not stop you from living.

Anything that makes you just exist and not live is not worth it.

Live, live, live life!!!
May God rest Ibidun’s soul and comfort her family.

May death not cut off our lives untimely. Amen

Does this resonate with you?

©️Omobabinrin Adeola Osideko
Personal Development Coach
Personal Branding Expert



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